Friday, October 25, 2013

The Grass is Always Greener By: Karen Pilarski

 There is an old adage that goes "The grass is always greener on the other side." When a person, thing or location is outside the normality of our lives, we tend view it as something far more spectacular. It is a sneaky aspect of of the daily grind. A seed of  irregular thought is planted and within days or weeks becomes a wild and untamed idea. The happiness and beauty of our own garden looks like weeds and brown grass in comparison to the other person's picturesque yard.

If the irrational thinking is not tended to then sore feelings start to fester. Eventually time and work invested was for naught. Icy glares and jealousy sprays a frost over what was planted. That is the precisely the second love and aspirations begin to die.

*Simone, a raven haired beauty wore her banged up heart on her sleeve. I felt a sisterly connection to her. She was street and book smart, dreamed big and loved hard. Those traits were things I admired about her. I could see my own past self in her warm brown eyes.

She enjoyed dancing and carefree days in her busy city. Simone ferociously tried to make her garden flourish yet heartbreak took a toll. Soon thoughts became frozen like flowers under wet snow. She thought a warmer climate would mean better conditions and a chance to thaw.

*Brenda, a married television writer was struggling to make ends meat. She worked at low rated television show. She had talent and promise to turn the show around. Her colleague was smart, kind and intelligent. He wasn't married but was seriously involved with another person. While her husband was handsome, smart and funny, he seemed to lack motivation.

She began to wish she was with her colleague and was jealous of his relationship. The colleague had money and a nice home. Brenda could barely pay the bills. While Brenda would never step outside her marriage she felt stagnant in her life. She wanted to a senior writer on a late night show that was highly rated. Someone she felt her successful colleague would provide her with what was missing.

In both cases the grass looked brighter and healthier. However, the reality can be deceptive. Often what is observed is not really what is there. Simone could move out of the area and be penniless and homeless. Brenda could hook up with the colleague who might turn out to be a controlling cheap jerk. The grass might actually be AstroTurf. It is tempting to run from problems and bad storms on the horizon. The truth is problems are like weeds, they seems to pop up where you least expect it. The weeds twist into dried knots and are impossible to pull out of the ground.

 Life and love take work, like a garden. It is fragile and valuable and if you are lucky worth all the thorny patches to make it grow.